My Little Button

MY LITTLE BUTTON Is a story of HOPE through Prayer and Guidance, Bilqees Meddou, a Mauritanian American 15 months old. On May 25, 2015 life for my little princess, who was 15 months old, change completely. My little Bilqees went from being energetic and vibrant to lifeless with little to no emotions at all. She went from laughing and playing to constant crying and lying and from running to barely crawling. In a few days it will be four months since the day Bilqees swallowed a Button Battery / Lithium Battery that was lodged in her upper esophagus (throat) for two and a half days, leaving her vocal cords paralyzed and a HOLE in her esophagus and her trachea. Whatever she tried to swallow would go directly into her lungs from her esophagus by way of the two holes. This made it impossible for her to eat or drink anything by mouth without severaly choking. Bilqees underwent two abdominal surgeries to have a FEEDING TUBE placed so that she could get the nutrients needed to sustain her body during this physiological and psychological stress. Some of the physical changes that have taken place with Bilqees since this tragedy are inability to swallow any substance, from her own saliva to drops of water, without causing severe choking and airway blockage and inability to walk and sit up at times. She’s had several respiratory infections along with skin irritations and infections. The most trying of all was her extreme weight loss during the past three months. She went from 10.5 kilograms (23.1 lbs.)to 7.9 kilograms (17.3 lbs). She hasn’t been able to speak since the incident occurred and for several months she lost her voice almost completely. Her cry was a hoarse whisper sound that was forced out during severe distress or tantrums. Her nights were sleepless, restless and interrupted with several bouts of choking, pain, irritation and discomfort along with her uncomfortable sleeping position of 90 degrees to decrease the choking and aspiration episodes. I have been holding on to PRAYER and drawing all of my strength and faith from consulting my Lord. Although I am an ER nurse with six years of experience, I’ve never embarked on such a trying situation. I changed my life so much over these past months hoping to find a natural way to correct this problem with my baby girl. I can’t imagine her undergoing another surgery especially in her THROAT. I recall the doctors telling that she was going to die, even with the feeding tube, if she didn't get surgery on her throat. I couldn't imagine that with time her TISSUE could not regenerate itself and her throat couldn’t return to normal. I am a BELIEVER, I believe with EVERY DISEASE there is a CURE. Not with every disease there is a TREATMENT for the symptoms, no but there is a way to eradicate the DISEASE and the body can heal itself by ALLAH’S permission. So what has happened to me over these few months? How have I managed without the MEDICAL support that is thrust upon people in the states? How have I dealt with the fear, doubt and accusations of Bilqees fate or outcome being DEATH, which is solely due to my stubbornness to remain in a poor AFRICAN COUNTRY and not return to the LAND OF SURE CURES, Amreeka. Well I’ve been extremely STRESSED to say the least. Yes, Hajjah Karimah the one who seems to have it all together broke down completely. I shut down and fell on my face with my hands up crying to my Sustainer for HELP, GUIDANCE, PROTECTION, and A CURE. The first thing that my Lord reassured me was that, whether I went to the U.S. or remained in Africa the soul is for Him to take and he will take it when He pleases. In Ramadan Bilqees got a hold to something while sitting with her sister but we didn’t know what it was. She was choking very badly and her airway was completely blocked. I tried everything I could to clear her airway, wallahi I was so frightened, helpless and drained. After doing everything I could my baby collapsed in my arms and I could only look at my 12 year old and 7 year old and cry a mother’s cry, “she’s gone yall she’s gone!” My son ran outside looking for help and I screamed from the top of my Lungs, “help me! Please help me!” I tried to clear her airway one last time with every breath I had and then turned her over and hit her on her back, at that moment something flew out of her month and she cried and sat on the floor, it was a piece of tomato. Mashallah, this was one of the most trying days of my life. My daughter asked me a question that made me realize something very valuable. She said, “ummie why were you screaming, help me! Help me!” In English when everyone speaks Arabic, no one understood you.” I replied yes my child, I was heard, and by the one I needed so much to hear me and understand me, heard me and responded promptly ( completely ) and appropriately, Allah s.w.t. I told her if Bilqees’s soul was being taking at that moment no one could have stopped it, no one could have helped except for Allah. Second my Lord allowed me to find two very intriguing but extremely sad stories of two children who had suffered the same fate as Bilqees. One you can find on Google called, “The boy who survived 65 surgeries after swallowing a Button Battery” this story took place in the U.S. and the other was about a boy who survived 10 surgeries in Austrailia. Everywhere I searched I only found conventional invasive measures to deal with this situation. I couldn't believe that was the only alternative to healing my baby's throat and restoring health. I just needed time and a route to give her the NATURAL medicines and foods to promote healing. After watching and reading their stories I was convinced I did not want this to happen to my daughter. The feeding tube was a necessity and a means to give her all the natural foods and herbs to help her heal but the throat surgery was not necessary, at least I hoped and believed. Thirdly, my lord empowered me with the knowledge, natural resources and the courage to help heal Bilqees’s throat and get her back to good health in spite of my natural fear and worry as a mother . The first place to start was FOOD and DRINK. What we eat and drink has MEDICINAL AND NUTRITIONAL VALUE and this is what my little girl needed. I changed her diet and mines completely to promote healing, by decreasing mucus and ridding the body of bacteria and parasites that come and grow in the presence of process and refined foods, along with other unhealthy practices. I began to cook, drink and use everything natural, everything was and is done by hand and Alhamdulillah I’ve seen many physiological and emotional changes with Bilqees and I. Bilqees has not seen a doctor since the last week of Ramadan. Not because I chose not to consult one but because the doctors working on her case felt that she should have been taken back to America immediately after the feeding tube was placed. They believed she was not going to live if she remained in Mauritania and one reason being her tube feeding. See, the first tube was placed in Bilqees’s stomach (gastric area) but two days after placement she aspirated her feeding and the doctor immediately removed the tubing re-routing it to her Jejunum. Wow, was I in for a big surprise. I was ready for the feedings; I had done this all before with elderly patients so I wasn’t worried about the feedings, well that’s what I thought, until I encountered a feeding tube in the small intestines. Well if you are familiar with GASTRIC BYPASS, where people have a small portion of their stomachs attached to their small intestines to lose weight, this feeding route via Bilqees’s small intestines gave the same result. I couldn’t believe what was happening with my baby. My chunky little girl who has a feeding tube, that I was feeding her healthy weight gaining food through, was rapidly losing weight and I couldn’t understand why. I cried out in the middle of the night to Allah, because there was no one to seek advice from. Most would all say the same thing, Karimah maybe you should take her back to the U.S. Except for my oldest son Yusuf, he was adamant that if she was returning to Allah NO place, NO doctor, NO medicine could stop that. I begged my Lord to guide me because I was watching my baby deteriorate before my eyes. We could see her ribs from the front and the back of her BODY. She only wanted to lay down, no smiles, no nothing. I began to understand what was happening with Bilqees’s food by the guidance of Allah and to understand why the doctor was so adamant about her getting to the states. Jejunum feedings are not the feeding of choice with children and when they are used they are administered via small continuous feedings by an electric pump and not via bolus feedings like I was giving through a 60 cc syringe. The small intestines cannot hold this large amount of food at one time at such a fast rate. Also the food was not being absorbed like it would be in the STOMACH, so no matter what I did she was destined to lose weight. This is why Gastric Bypass is so successful. Many things happened after understanding this but for the most part my baby was still losing weight, sure weight loss. I was at a standstill, I was at a lost. With the whispers of doubt and despair constantly creeping up I continued to beg, plead and cry for help. Even if I had decided to take my baby back to the U.S. all of our funds had depleted, so there could be no regrets and no looking back. I haven’t worked since May and I’ve been living off of my savings and the support from believers that have helped me during this time. At the point where I had no other ideas, no other thoughts, my Lord opened a door I could never imagine would open. I stopped socializing during this time partly because of the pity that people showed which would stress me out even more. I wanted prayer and hope and not sorrow and pity but this is the nature of trials and tribulations. Also Mauritanians are very disturbed by the sick, mentally ill and death, they cannot stand to hear about it let alone see it. I was invited to come and sit with a group from South Africa and Mauritania, some of whom had covered the topic of health and food prior to Bilqees’s illness. After backing out several times, I decided to attend. While having lunch Bilqees was on my lap and out of nowhere she took a hand full of rice and put it in her mouth. Yaa Allah, I was shaking, petrified and horrified. I didn’t want her to choke like she did with the tomato especially not there in front of everyone. They screamed, “ Karimah! Bilqees has food in her mouth.” I ran out of the sitting room and tried my best to get it all out of her mouth. I knew I couldn’t leave, not even a grain of rice, because it would cause her severe distress. Well to no avail, she had swallowed some so I just prayed she would be spared the stress of choking. I just stared at her waiting for the results of the rice that may have entered her lungs. Five minutes nothing, fifteen minutes nothing, one hour nothing. We returned home and nothing, Alhamdulillah she didn’t choke; it was at that moment that I knew there were some changes taking place in her throat. She wasn’t ready to eat a meal but maybe we could begin to try and give her some thicken pureed foods. I did and she coughed with some feedings but no choking, Alhamdulillah. This too had its ups and downs with periods of severe coughing, sometimes choking and sometimes nothing by mouth just tube feedings, but here we are now one month and a half later and my baby takes her breakfast, lunch and dinner by mouth. She either drinks it from her syringe or with her finger from a saucer. She has some coughing but not much. The consistency of her food is very important to minimize severe coughing and choking. Just two days ago I was able to give her drops of water via her syringe without choking and with minimum coughing, ALHAMDULILLAH! Some other improvements that have taken place since Bilqees has been able to take food by mouth, she’s laughing and playing with the children. Her voice is coming back slowly, she’s able to make sounds that are very close to words, the children practice with her several times a day and they become extremely excited by every new sound she makes. She stood up the other day and kicked her leg, Allahu Akbar! Bilqees was known for her happy go lucky personality, so to see her smiling has been a blessings and joy for me. She’s crawling everywhere so we have to put the gates up again to keep her in one place. She’s been able to sleep flat on the bed and sleep through the night for over one month now. She has went from 7.9 kilograms to 8.4 kilograms, ALHAMDULILLAH! Wallahi only my Lord knows where we have come from on this journey with her. The month of Ramadan she only slept 2 or 3 hours during the night. I slept sitting up holding her for two months waking every few minutes from coughing or choking and walking the floors most of the night, I couldn’t even finish reading the Quran during Ramadan due to extreme exhaustion and fatigue, I was heartbroken. I am a witness, with every difficulty there is ease. In closing, we have a long way to go for complete healing, which is the natural process, but we are extremely grateful to Allah s.w.t. for the guidance. The doctors wanted to do an Endoscope to see the extent of damage in her throat and to determine if her tubing could come out. I asked for more time to work with her before making the decision to have a scope placed in her throat. One I wanted her throat to heal more and second I didn’t want to exacerbate the situation any further due to the side effects of the endoscope, such as, perforation (hole, puncture, tear, damage) of the existing opening, lacerations (cuts, slashes, scratches)in the throat, all which would lead to a set back if not complete disability of her esophagus all over again. I truly believe, “if it works don’t fix it” or if it works don’t mess with it. I am in much need of your prays during this healing process. I wrote this in response to the many requests on an update of Bilquees. Many people have written asking if we need anything and the response is YES! PRAYER, PRAYER, and more PRAYER! I haven’t worked for over four months and I am praying my students will return by next month before I have to pay my monthly bills, inshallah, so all and any financial support is welcomed. Remember the body is a SYSTEM; it works in unisons with the physical, mental and spiritual. When healing we must treat the WHOLE system and not the symptoms, this will eradicate the invader and restore optimum health. “LET THY FOOD BE THY MEDICINE AND LET THY MEDICINE BE THY FOOD!” I am writing an essay entitled, “You, Food and Disease Free” is a short essay coming soon inshallah. This situation DIDN'T break me it made me a stronger BELIEVER in the POWER and CURE of ALLAH. The stress didn't cripple me IT EMPOWERED me to search for all the resources that ALLAH s.w.t. has given man on earth to sustain himself through sickness and HEALTH. The despair and depression that came forced me to seek psychological assistance via NIGHT PRAYER and QURANIC recitation. It MOTIVATED me to change my life to walk closer in the Footsteps of the Prophet s.a.a.w.s. and to abandon the PROGRESSION and footsteps of the ENEMY of man, shaytaan. May Allah s.w.t. grant me my prayer and desire to be able to help people cure themselves by the guidance and knowledge of ALLAH. Jazaakumullahu Khairun for all of your help and support! Hajjah Karimah Nouakchott, Mauritania September 23, 2015 Update after Nine Months: One month, October 2016, after I posted My Little Button story about Bilqees, we had the worst scare ever experienced in this entire journey / test. Bilqees's older siblings arrived in Mauritania and she was surrounded by family and a host of young nieces and nephews which gave her lots of incentive to strive, Alhamdulillah. Well one morning I baked a small loaf of barley bread and everyone had a taste. Bilqees screamed and cried for some so I broke a small piece off and gave it to her, she ate it without difficulty. She then found a larger piece on the floor and ate it but this wasn't as successful as the the first piece of bread. It lodged in her airway and we tried everything possible, as did she, to dislodge it. After her oldest brother and tried for some time, which seemed like forever, Bilqees clinched my fingers with her teeth, me being a Nurse, was a sure sign she was gone, and she stopped breathing. I could only scream, She's gone, She's DEAD!!! Everyone was frantic and screaming, except for my Son, Yusuf. He continued to do chess compressions on my baby girl and try and get me to refocus by asking, "Ummie how do you clear her airway" I continued to cry and say YUSUF SHE'S GONE, but he wouldn't listen to me and he continued doing chest compression, at that moment, Allah gave us another chance with my baby GIRL, He allowed the food to shoot out of Bilqees's mouth and I BECAME THE HUMAN SUCTION PUMP for my baby. We were extremely blessed but not out of the clear. She was semi-conscious with a comprised airway and her breathing was barely enough to inhale or exhale Oxygen. We ran out to the street with her in our arms until some random man stopped and took us to children's hospital. The entire time we continue to do abdominal thrusts to help get all the food out of her airway. After little to no assistance at three different hospitals that said she was basically DEAD, we decided to sit UNDER a TREE outside the hospital and again watch the power of Allah at work. By the COMMANDMENT OF ALLAH a breeze came that brought exactly what my baby needed, 100 % PURE Oxygen, and Bilqees took in a deep breath and began breathing from that point. We decided to return home because it was clear if Bilqees was going to LIVE OR DIE it would only be by the COMMANDMENT OF ALLAH and we had already experienced the worst situation with her so the best place was home outside under the night sky with the night air. Bilqees continued to thrive after that but we saw that her healing was hampered by the TUBING IN HER ABDOMEN, which was a foreign object. We decided to remove the Jejunum tube after we started feeding her by mouth for one month. The hole in her abdomen took two to three weeks to heal, something that worried me also, because most tube feeding openings take about two to three days to close. Alhamdulillah with feeding her lots of CELLULAR foods (foods that promote cell growth and regeneration) it closed. Nine months later and many trials, Bilqees has progressed tremendously. Eating all of her foods and meals by month without difficulty. She's gained 5kg. and she's talking, playing, running like a normal child her age. We continue with our healthy for living and healing lifestyle and we prayer Bilqees's story will be an inspiration for many, it has been for us, especially ME, HER MOTHER AND CARETAKER. Praise and Thanks are for Allah s.w.t. alone! July, 18, 2016 Nouakchott, Mauritania Hajjah Karimah